Though it's rarely discussed, research has long suggested very few women are actually straight, at least, not as far as the traditional definition of heterosexuality is concerned. I've found myself on the receiving end of these comments in real-life, too, by well-meaning strangers and peers alike. Since my own coming out, barely a day has passed when I haven't opened social media to see a comment suggesting my queerness is a performance, a cry for attention from men, or a reaction to not being able to find 'a good man'. Queer women and femme-identifying people face disproportionate discrimination and violence as a result of this, and are additionally far more likely to have our relationships stigmatised, fetishised, and delegitimised. To identify as anything outside of this, and rebel against the idea that appeasing men is the price we pay for admission into the world as women, is to threaten the entire ecosystem of the forest. Instead of recognising what's around us, compulsory heterosexuality (the idea of presenting straightness as a kind of 'default setting') teaches women to view ourselves through the lens of the male gaze.
That's the thing about heteronormative culture it takes roots in our lives that grow into branches which weave themselves around us so insidiously, we can't see the forest we're walking through.
